Kevi Kind finds life at the Carmelite Orphanage a drag. Her gooney sister, Theresa, spends too much time creating "Bead Cities" out of her broken rosary beads, and ever since Father Kennedy took her virginity and gave her a blanket absolution, he's been acting like a love-sick creep. And Kevi can't bear the diet pill powered Sister Harriet who raves on and on about the wrath of God breaking through, and continues to share a bed with Sister Martha, years after their graduation. Theresa intends to make a public confession and reveal to the world who she and Kevi really are. Kevi must force Theresa to keep her trap shut because she's just been signed for a revival of "The Sound of Music" with Robert Redford in his first singing role. And did Eva Peron really hide out at the orphanage? And which of the nuns is, in reality, Adolph Hitler?