Lori Horvitz grew up ashamed of her Eastern European Jewish roots, confused about her sexuality, and idolising the "shiksa in her living room", a blonde all-American girl whose photo came in a double frame and was displayed next to a family photo from a bar mitzvah. Unable to join the "happy blonde families", she becomes a "hippie chick" who travels the world in search of 'something'. This book chronicles each trip, each romance, each experiment in reinventing herself that draws her closer to discovering the secret door through which she can escape from deep-rooted patterns and accept her own cultural, ethnic, and sexual identity.